Give Respect Even Before It’s Earned
If I had a nickel for everytime I suggested to a wife that they should show their husband respect and they responded with, “As soon as he deserves it, I will.” I’d have a bunch of nickels.
Against Your Grain
I know it’s counterintuitive to give something you don’t think someone else deserves, but there are a few biblical truths at work right here. The first involves judging others and the other is sowing and reaping.
Men have a need for respect (not false praise). Even if he is not where you may think he should be in the respect game, the only way to elevate him is by treating him with the level of respect you’d love to see him at.
Kindergarten
An example I use is if you want your child to be a surgeon, and only set them in an empty classroom starting in 1st grade until adulthood, they will never achieve the educational level to enter medical school, but if you fill their classroom with teachers, lessons and stimulating resources to model academic standards required to enter medical school, then their chances of success are incredibly high.
Reaping Respect
God the Father gives the perfect example of speaking positive words of affirmation into His son’s life. Once Jesus emerged from the waters of baptism, His father spoke:
And a voice from heaven said, “This is my Son, whom I love; with him I am well pleased.” (Matthew 3:17)
How incredible do you think Jesus felt to hear his Father show love, affirmation and respect? I can imagine, because when my spiritual father says I’m incredible and that he loves me, my heart sores.
Please make the commitment to begin or continue to speak life into the men (and boys) in your life. Along with praying for them, you will see a dynamic change in their lives. Then they will operate at an elevated level because they are walking within God’s anointing.
I Respect You
Even if you grew up like I did without ever hearing positive words from parents, it’s never too late to learn the truth that God your Father does in fact respect you and loves you. You are His beloved child! I want you to know that these aren’t empty words but God’s very own heart.
I’m praying for you and look forward to seeing you engage with us at Five Stones Church Online
Scott
Categories: Dr. Scott Silverii
Regarding the attitude displayed when a wife says “As soon as he deserves it, I will.”, I am reminded that the same thinking is often used about sex. In that case, the wives’ argument is that he must meet her emotional needs before she will open the gate for sex.
I am somewhat surprised, and definitely disappointed, that you did not reference Ephesians 5:33, which clearly commands wives, at least in many newer English translations, to respect their husbands unconditionally.
[Eph 5:33 NASB] “Nevertheless, each individual among you also is to love his own wife even as himself, and the wife must [see to it] that she respects her husband.”