CEO – Show Them God’s Love This Easter: One Word Matters

CEO – Show Them God’s Love

Growing up, my parents, who were good blue collar folks, never took us kids to church. Not even the obligatory Christmas or Easter. We dressed up nice and opened gifts or rummaged through baskets of chocolate, but Christ had no role in the home.

We were not even what our pastor Robert Morris at Gateway Church kindly called a CEO – “Christmas & Easter Only”

This Easter it is so important to pursue the CEO’s in our life. Invite and encourage them to come to church. It doesn’t have to be your church, nor should it be a guilt trip reminding them of their last 364 days of failing to attend a service.

Many people go on Easter Sunday for the first time for many reasons, but all that matters is that they go, and they hear the gospel of Christ.

What good does one day do?

The day Jesus was crucified, was the first time the criminals on either side of Him were in His presence. While one rejected the Him, the other received Christ and entered paradise for his faith.

Then he said, “Jesus, remember me when you come into your kingdom.” Jesus answered him, “Truly I tell you, today you will be with me in paradise.”

Luke 23:42-43

We all know a CEO, and at times, been a CEO. This Easter, if the gentle title of CEO fits, make a point to attend a service. If you know a CEO, make a point to invite them to attend a service. It can even be hard to decide what church is right for your, or if asked, which is best on recommended.

Although, there are a month of Sundays, this one day might be the breakthrough. First impressions matter. Consider this choice carefully. While some may enjoy the pomp and circumstance of an elaborate ceremony delivered in Latin, the seeker desperate for God’s word simply needs to hear just that – God’s Word.

You might just be responsible for the one time it takes to know the resurrected Christ. I trust you’ll have a blessed Easter week.

Much Love / Much Respect,
Scott

Profiles In Personal Pain: Which One Are You and How Do You Manage It?

Profiles In Personal Pain: Which One Are You and How Do You Manage It?

What’s really eating away at you? Are regrets consuming your thoughts so you’re forced to shut them down? Can you sit in silence without a mental movie flooding your brain and demanding that you fill the quiet?

You’re not alone. The pain we carry from our past is tucked away and always available to muck up our lives or turn gold star moments into brown star regrets.

We allow pain, shame and regret to consume us with stress over how to cope with it. Unfortunately, the coping solves nothing. Healing does.

Have you developed your own secret way of helping to ease that hurt? Does your way involve something that if exposed, would embarrass, ruin your reputation or cost you a career? If so, then you are not working toward healing, you are enabling the hurt.

God gives us examples and consequences of how avoiding Him only drags out the injury. There are three primary ways we try to manage pain.

Why do we avoid God? Because the devil whispers in our ear that we’re not worthy, and that we can’t trust God because all He wants to do is convict and punish us. I will tell you that there is no other way than through Jesus Christ the great healer and physician.

~DAVID~

King David was exalted as a great and mighty ruler. God himself, chose David to be king over Israel because of what He saw on the inside.

Man looks at how someone appears on the outside.

But I look at what is in the heart.

1 Samuel 16:7b

Although David was anointed by God, he didn’t come to the throne without serious personal baggage. David is a lot like us in carrying personal pain from our past.

Medication is the first way of unsuccessfully dealing with pain. David’s medication of choice was the flesh. His sexual addiction caused problems for everyone associated with him.

David’s pain was rooted in the rejection by his father. He wasn’t considered worthy of meeting the prophet Samuel who came to anoint a ruler. Yet, there in that rejected, messed up boy, Israel had a king. David’s rejection stung and stuck. Have you been hurt by a parent, and never forgave them? This injury doesn’t heal in time.

I’ll share that as a kid, I’d gotten a red warm-up suit with white stripes. It looked just like my hero, Steve Austin, The Six Million Dollar Man (Not the wrestler.) I wore it everywhere.

One day my dad called out to me, but I was mixing it up with the neighborhood kids. Then I heard his words very clearly, “Hey, idiot in that red suit, I’m talking to you.” I was about ten years old. I stuffed that track suit in the trash, and forty-two years later, those words still hurt.

~SOLOMON~

The son of David, Solomon was by far the wealthiest and most wise human ever to grace the earth. Even though, he was born out of scandal with Bathsheba as his mother. He was a result of sexual sin, and the generational curse of his father continued to plague him too.

Motivation and achievements were Solomon’s failed attempt to soothe his pain. The more he accumulated the less he felt deserving. In Ecclesiastes 2 he shares the futility of trying to outwork his hurt.

I’ve included this small section of the scripture, but please read the entire Chapter 2:1-24.

10 I denied myself nothing my eyes desired;

I refused my heart no pleasure.

My heart took delight in all my labor,

and this was the reward for all my toil.

11 Yet when I surveyed all that my hands had done

and what I had toiled to achieve,

everything was meaningless, a chasing after the wind;

nothing was gained under the sun.

Ecclesiastes 2:10-11

This is so personal to me, as I suspect it is to many of you. I crushed and conquered my way through a career, athletics and academics, only to help me feel less empty. It soon became impossible to fill this empty spaces. Our spirit requires peace, not prizes.

~ABSALOM~

There is a third unhealthy way of dealing with our hurt. Absalom was David’s son and Solomon’s half-brother. His pain, like many with a dominant parent, began at home. Absalom also suffered from intense guilt over doing nothing to defend his sister from a sexual attack by another half-brother.

Meditation stewed in his spirit as hatred intensified. For two years he avoided confronting his feelings and the offender before it erupted, and he killed his brother.

Attacks against others is what defines him. Are you feeling the rage of regret and wrongdoings roil beneath the surface while you look for an outlet to unleash your fury upon?

God placed a message on my heart in the recent past that remains with me today. “Avoiding is not winning.” You can only sweep so much junk under the rug. If it’s confessing a wrong to a friend, spouse, co-worker, or forgiving yourself for messing up once again, time does not heal all wounds. It is a lie, so don’t let stuff fester in your soul.

Which One Are You?

Do you booze it until you lose it, yet it’s worse than it began? Please understand that the substances used to fight addiction are not the problem. The problem is you’re using addictive substances to avoid healing from your pain.

Brothers and sisters; drinking, screwing and fighting will not heal your hurt. Don’t listen to the devil. You are good and you are worthy to be loved. God wants to heal you because He loves you. He’s not waiting to smack you like a carnival game of whack-a-mole. Allow yourself to heal. It’s better than the hurt.

Much Love,

Scott-Leah Silverii

Preparing Your Mouth: Speaking Life & Death

On the flip side, think about the spiritual, emotional and social deaths when harsh, threatening or negative words are spoken. Telling a child they are stupid or no good, only curses them for future hurt from someone they loved to nurture them.

Read the Entire Article – Click HERE

 

FIT@50: An Odd Space For A Kettlebell

 

FIT@50

This was fun. Going to the gym and not really sure where to move to get out of everyone’s way. So there’s this guy, big guy, and he’s pushing the earth off his chest on the bench press.

There’s like two feet of space between him and the other guy grunting like he’s trapped in a mouse hole with an angry cat on his trail.

I grab a kettlebell and begin doing something useless to warm up that involved a lot of bending and stretching, but just shy of becoming a Richard Simmons’ routine.

The mirror shows both guys impatiently waiting. I suddenly feel like I’m there as entertainment for them and I pick up my kettlebell and slip into a corner.

Yeah, I’ll admit that standing in the middle of the open floor space probably wasn’t wise, but hold on, I’m going to say it, “Nobody puts baby in the corner.”

Thankfully it got much better after that. Mostly because Atlas set the world back on its axis and grunty-grunter’s wife showed up and they became more interested in what was on TV than my location.

The best part of this workout was when I experienced for the first time in about 7 years that my t-shirt felt more snug around my chest and arms than it did around my gut.

I snapped this pic of a barbell I found on the floor. No actually, I was using it. But, for the first time in so long I cared nothing about how much it weighed, and everything about how it made me feel. It made me feel healthy.

It’s way too early in the fight to proclaim that I’ve reclaimed not just my health, but my joy. Although, this is the best I’ve felt about my chances of taking control in a long time.

It’s an odd shackle when the devil tells you that there’s still too much work left to be done at the desk, and I shouldn’t leave Leah to go exercise. The last few weeks I’ve been able to free myself of the guilt of turning in less than a 16 hour day, to dedicate an hour to my fitness.

So, in reality, who cares how much weight sits on either end of that bar? I’m here and that’s what counts.

Do Good,
Scott

FIT@50: An Odd Space For A Kettlebell

FIT@50: The Devil’s Whisper

FIT@50

After a few visits to the gym, I’ve finally started to feel like I’m actually working out as opposed to struggling to get by. But oh that old devil that resides besides each encouraging thought.

No sooner had I set the dumbells into the rack did I drop onto the padded bench to take a breather. I felt good about the effort. Then my eyes scanned over to the “dark side” of the weight rack. You know, the lower rack where the big, heavy dumbbells sit.

I heard the whisper, “Look how weak you’ve become over the years.”
Then I was reminded of the promise, and I replied, “But I am here.”

Gaining freedom from our past can be tough, but once unshackled, our lives become free to soar.
Do Good,
Scott

FIT@50: The Devil’s Whisper

5 Dangers To Avoid: Money Matters In Marriage

5 Dangers To Avoid: Money Matters In Marriage

DANGER #1 – DISREGARDING THE LORDSHIP OF JESUS IN YOUR FINANCES

DANGER #2 – DISRESPECTING YOUR SPOUSE’S FINANCIAL PERSPECTIVE AND INPUT

DANGER #3 – DOMINANCE OF MONEY AND FINANCIAL DECISIONS

DANGER #4 – DISAGREEMENT ABOUT FINANCIAL DECISIONS, PRIORITIES AND VALUES

DANGER #5 – DEBT

When God’s Will Conflicts With Facebook Algorithms

Several months back I undertook an overhaul of our Facebook presence atMarriage Matters. Trying to tap into that perfect stream of increased engagement while maintaining the vision placed on our hearts was a challenge.

But what wasn’t a challenge is giving you a free gift. It saved our marriage and millions of others. Don’t worry, it’s waiting for you at the end of this piece. God bless you!

SMATGW

Sure, we could follow the traditional social media models by boosting posts, paying for ads and hawking new likes like a nightclub sidewalk caller. But, we’ve committed to doing SMATGW (social media according to God’s will.) No need to Google it, I just made that up. But we really did say we’d do only as He led us to do.

Now, God’s got nothing against digging into the insights section of our Marriage Matters’ page, so I hunkered down and accessed every bit of data I could gain short of applying for a FISA warrant (too soon?)

It showed me the best times to post were in the evenings when our friends were most active. Next, the data drilled into the types of posts that gained the most engagement and traction. Finally, it showed us that resorting to the traditional models for social media growth would be more productive in growing our presence.

It’s a Funny Thing

Even before I started my quest for uncovering the secrets locked within our Facebook account, God began sharing a word with us. He wanted us to begin going live on Marriage Matters to share the secrets of His word.

Once I worked out the technology needed to pre-schedule shows, insert slides, images and other video capture devices into the course of a live broadcast, we were ready to roll. Then God got very specific in His word. He wanted us to go live three times each week, and here’s the kicker, at 6:30.

Oh, that’s 6:30 in the AM!!!!

You see the funny thing, we’re night owls who work until about 3 or 4 in the morning while it’s quiet and no one is texting, emailing or calling. Peaceful, silent solitude. So surely, God was kidding when He said that. I mean really, go live at 6:30 in the morning? Who does that?

Giving God A Hand

We’ve been guilty of trying to give God a hand at having His will get done. Impatience has been one thing we’ve worked on and have mostly begun to wait on the Lord. The 16th chapter of Genesis became very profound during this period. God promised Sarah and Abraham a child, but after 10 years, they were still empty nesters.

Sarah decided to help God out by giving her servant, Hagar to Abraham to conceive a child and therefore allow God to save face by delivering that promised child to her husband. Well, that didn’t really work out too well.

So here we are a few thousand years later and guess what?

We figured God had to be kidding about the early morning time slot. Besides, I’d just completed an in-depth analytical analysis of our Facebook data. The earliest optimal time to post anything was at and after 5:00pm. So we decided to compromise.

We shot, recorded and edited three great episodes. Complete with intro, outro, title screens and subtitles. I loaded them up on Marriage Matters and scheduled one each for Monday, Wednesday and Friday at 6:30AM.

BAM, my work was done.

Second Chances

That first Monday, I woke up around 10:00am, anxious to see the show’s reach, comments, likes, loves and shares. I washed my face and slipped on my readers so I could soak it all in. I was ready to spend the morning responding to the overload of questions and comments.

You know the outcome, right? There was one like and it was Leah, who had tagged it while I was washing my face. I thought it was because it was the first show. It would catch on by Friday. The Wednesday and Friday shows aired as scheduled, but with even worse results.

It had to have been because God’s will conflicted with the Facebook algorithm. I knew the crack of dawn wasn’t the right time. I became hurt and resentful over the weekend. How could we have invested all of that time and effort into the very material God led us to share, only to have it fade into the nothingness that it arrived in.

Sarah, Hagar and Abraham were placed on my heart, and I knew what God was showing me. I was disobedient, even in a desire to “help,” I failed to follow SMATGW because I decided to:

  1. Lean on my own understanding (Facebook data)
  2. Impose my will (Sleep way past 6:30am)
  3. Prideful look (Airing an edited version instead of raw and live.)

In God’s mercy, He showed me that although the trio were all complicit in failing to wait upon His promise, that they were still blessed and God’s promise was fulfilled. Hagar’s son Ishmael became the start of a great nation, Sarah’s son, Isaac led the tribes of Israel to rise as promised and Abraham is the father of many generations.

Despite our human frailty, God gives grace and blessings. But, what about the live show?

In Our Obedience

By the next Monday, God had shown me it had nothing to do with social media presence or increased engagement. It wasn’t even about sharing His word on marriage. God wanted my servant, sacrificial heart to step out on faith and do as He asked me to do.

He didn’t need an earful of data and best social media practices. It was simply a question of was I willing to sacrifice for His will. Was I willing to sacrifice “me” time to dedicate to preparing the script, verses and slides the night before, and be ready to air at 6:30am?

I was so sorry that weekend and felt ashamed for trying to help Him out, when the lesson He wanted to share with His son wasn’t about the way, but only about His will.

Prime Time

I’ll tell you that it’s not always a halo and a choir of angels trumpeting onto do God’s will. That Monday, we drug each other out of bed while trying to steal naps in between brushing teeth, turning on lights and setting up what we like to call, “The Studio.”

With puffy eyes and no idea if the technology would work, we hit the “Start Streaming” button and BAM, we were live.It didn’t matter that we’d only had 2 hours of sleep, or that no one commented or even viewed the show. We were in God’s will.

We repeated that sleepy, sluggish scenario again on Wednesday and then Friday. We’ve done this the last 3 weeks, and while our work and family schedules don’t allow us to go to bed much earlier, we’re still thankful to be in His will. We smack the alarms a few times, hug while praying and then get to work with SMATGW.

I’d love to tell you in less than a month, our live morning Facebook show has gone viral and changed millions of lives. We can’t, not yet, but what we can share is the friends who join us in the morning are a blessing to us and the emails about how they love watching while getting ready for their day has blessed them.

Witness Rewards

The greatest reward for our early morning prime-time special is the love we share with each other while promoting a God-centered marriage covenant model. Leah and I have grown so close since we began, and although we were close before, this opportunity has drawn us into a deeper understanding of God’s word and will.

There is sometimes a fear or hesitation in sharing your testimony in public. No, our marriage wasn’t perfect and it almost ended before it began, but we rolled up our sleeves and went to work. We flat refused to quit on each other, but that required we give each other up to God. He made the changes in us that saved us.

So, while I still do enjoy digging into data, we’re going to stick to the SMATGW approach. We pray you’ll decide to join us in our prime-time slot, but take heart. If you’re not a morning bird either, you can catch every episode at your convenience.

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Our Gift To You

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Click HERE and begin your 100% guarantee of a stronger, divorce-free marriage.

Let’s make divorce a dirty word,

Scott & Leah Silverii

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